this was in response to a question asked of me in a christian's blog about how does a non-believer know bible context? without even reading the bible I might add to that question... but I thought it a bit of a waste to just have it as a comment.... so... here's some pre-amble first.
I *have* read the bible, I'm proud to inform you all that I nearly made it half way through genius, gensus, genus, genisous, heinous? .. Genesis! right up to about that bit where Noah did his crazy thing with that boat trick... from there it was... urr... no ...
then I read the bit where Jesus was tempted by the devil in the desert or whatever it was... well at least I think I did, seeing how I was about 7/8/9yo (??) and all I remember of that, was that the bible I was reading was illustrated and had a very nice drawing/painting of Jesus and this red devil sort of character flying around... and well..
what was i saying? oh yes, then I read Revelations with the whole 6-6-6 yards and the Bark of the Meast, and well, then I was hooked on Rucifel!! Rucifel Natas, the great deceiver, that one dude that stood up to god...
Satan is my motor
bahahaha... they should take the references to Satan in the bible OUT!! because maybe, just *maybe*, everyone would then *FORGET* about him!! STOP DWELLING ON THE NEGATIVE, you IDJITS! oh what am i yelling for? The Rapture has been and gone, Blondie 1981... sheesh... missed it already, FOOLS
I wonder how many other evil ideas have people got out of the bible because it said that was this and this was that because it was.... *EVIL*..
Imagine some innocent person who gets accosted by some religidiot bible bashing moron... ten minutes later that person is going to be "oh if it's evil, I *got* to try it now.. I don't want to be like that bible basher!! what's that ''don't be gay?'', I never thought to be *gay* before, i think i'll try that first, then I'm going to have sex with animals, never had that idea before until the BIBLE told me not to have sex with animals! not sure I'm going to like the snake and lizard salad though, but I'll try anything to be different to that bible thumpin' moron!! - oh wait! what's this? the bible says eating locusts and grasshoppers is OK??
Levitcus 11:21 Yet these may ye eat of every flying creeping thing that goeth upon [all] four, which have legs above their feet, to leap withal upon the earth; Levitcus 11:22 [Even] these of them ye may eat; the locust after his kind, and the bald locust after his kind, and the beetle after his kind, and the grasshopper after his kind. 11:23 But all [other] flying creeping things, which have four feet, [shall be] an abomination unto you.
--King James V Bible
oh? right! context.. that's what i was talking about... using the book of Locutus of Borg as an example, wait.. the book of Leviticus, I mean, this is the bible, not star trek... the bible just isn't *that* cool...
btw! bahahahah @ Leviticus 11:23 for saying insects have FOUR legs... *bzzz* .. FAIL .. but I will concede that back then, that maybe insects just did happen to have four legs, I mean, it was a long time ago, surely evolution would explain the six legs insects have today, right?
oh right back to what i was saying, here's the context in context, contextually, no less..
The same goes for that bit in the bible that says women shouldn't speak in church, I somewhere read that that was addressed to a people where all the women ever did in church was gossip and chat and carry on like heads with their chook cut off, so the old bags of one particular area were told to shut the fuck up in church... seems someone took that out of context and applied it to *every* woman on the planet! bzzz .. *FAIL*
Leviticus Chapter 11
Lev 11:1 And the LORD spake unto Moses and to Aaron, saying unto them,
Lev 11:2 Speak unto the children of Israel, saying, These [are] the beasts which ye shall eat among all the beasts that [are] on the earth.
Lev 11:3 Whatsoever parteth the hoof, and is clovenfooted, [and] cheweth the cud, among the beasts, that shall ye eat.
Lev 11:4 Nevertheless these shall ye not eat of them that chew the cud, or of them that divide the hoof: [as] the camel, because he cheweth the cud, but divideth not the hoof; he [is] unclean unto you.
Lev 11:5 And the coney, because he cheweth the cud, but divideth not the hoof; he [is] unclean unto you.
Lev 11:6 And the hare, because he cheweth the cud, but divideth not the hoof; he [is] unclean unto you.
Lev 11:7 And the swine, though he divide the hoof, and be clovenfooted, yet he cheweth not the cud; he [is] unclean to you.
Lev 11:8 Of their flesh shall ye not eat, and their carcase shall ye not touch; they [are] unclean to you.
Lev 11:9 These shall ye eat of all that [are] in the waters: whatsoever hath fins and scales in the waters, in the seas, and in the rivers, them shall ye eat.
Lev 11:10 And all that have not fins and scales in the seas, and in the rivers, of all that move in the waters, and of any living thing which [is] in the waters, they [shall be] an abomination unto you:
Lev 11:11 They shall be even an abomination unto you; ye shall not eat of their flesh, but ye shall have their carcases in abomination.
Lev 11:12 Whatsoever hath no fins nor scales in the waters, that [shall be] an abomination unto you.
Lev 11:13 And these [are they which] ye shall have in abomination among the fowls; they shall not be eaten, they [are] an abomination: the eagle, and the ossifrage, and the ospray,
Lev 11:14 And the vulture, and the kite after his kind;
Lev 11:15 Every raven after his kind;
Lev 11:16 And the owl, and the night hawk, and the cuckow, and the hawk after his kind,
Lev 11:17 And the little owl, and the cormorant, and the great owl,
Lev 11:18 And the swan, and the pelican, and the gier eagle,
Lev 11:19 And the stork, the heron after her kind, and the lapwing, and the bat.
Lev 11:20 All fowls that creep, going upon [all] four, [shall be] an abomination unto you.
Lev 11:21 Yet these may ye eat of every flying creeping thing that goeth upon [all] four, which have legs above their feet, to leap withal upon the earth;
Lev 11:22 [Even] these of them ye may eat; the locust after his kind, and the bald locust after his kind, and the beetle after his kind, and the grasshopper after his kind.
Lev 11:23 But all [other] flying creeping things, which have four feet, [shall be] an abomination unto you.
Lev 11:24 And for these ye shall be unclean: whosoever toucheth the carcase of them shall be unclean until the even.
Lev 11:25 And whosoever beareth [ought] of the carcase of them shall wash his clothes, and be unclean until the even.
Lev 11:26 [The carcases] of every beast which divideth the hoof, and [is] not clovenfooted, nor cheweth the cud, [are] unclean unto you: every one that toucheth them shall be unclean.
Lev 11:27 And whatsoever goeth upon his paws, among all manner of beasts that go on [all] four, those [are] unclean unto you: whoso toucheth their carcase shall be unclean until the even.
Lev 11:28 And he that beareth the carcase of them shall wash his clothes, and be unclean until the even: they [are] unclean unto you.
Lev 11:29 These also [shall be] unclean unto you among the creeping things that creep upon the earth; the weasel, and the mouse, and the tortoise after his kind,
Lev 11:30 And the ferret, and the chameleon, and the lizard, and the snail, and the mole.
Lev 11:31 These [are] unclean to you among all that creep: whosoever doth touch them, when they be dead, shall be unclean until the even.
Lev 11:32 And upon whatsoever [any] of them, when they are dead, doth fall, it shall be unclean; whether [it be] any vessel of wood, or raiment, or skin, or sack, whatsoever vessel [it be], wherein [any] work is done, it must be put into water, and it shall be unclean until the even; so it shall be cleansed.
Lev 11:33 And every earthen vessel, whereinto [any] of them falleth, whatsoever [is] in it shall be unclean; and ye shall break it.
Lev 11:34 Of all meat which may be eaten, [that] on which [such] water cometh shall be unclean: and all drink that may be drunk in every [such] vessel shall be unclean.
Lev 11:35 And every [thing] whereupon [any part] of their carcase falleth shall be unclean; [whether it be] oven, or ranges for pots, they shall be broken down: [for] they [are] unclean, and shall be unclean unto you.
Lev 11:36 Nevertheless a fountain or pit, [wherein there is] plenty of water, shall be clean: but that which toucheth their carcase shall be unclean.
Lev 11:37 And if [any part] of their carcase fall upon any sowing seed which is to be sown, it [shall be] clean.
Lev 11:38 But if [any] water be put upon the seed, and [any part] of their carcase fall thereon, it [shall be] unclean unto you.
Lev 11:39 And if any beast, of which ye may eat, die; he that toucheth the carcase thereof shall be unclean until the even.
Lev 11:40 And he that eateth of the carcase of it shall wash his clothes, and be unclean until the even: he also that beareth the carcase of it shall wash his clothes, and be unclean until the even.
Lev 11:41 And every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth [shall be] an abomination; it shall not be eaten.
Lev 11:42 Whatsoever goeth upon the belly, and whatsoever goeth upon [all] four, or whatsoever hath more feet among all creeping things that creep upon the earth, them ye shall not eat; for they [are] an abomination.
Lev 11:43 Ye shall not make yourselves abominable with any creeping thing that creepeth, neither shall ye make yourselves unclean with them, that ye should be defiled thereby.
Lev 11:44 For I [am] the LORD your God: ye shall therefore sanctify yourselves, and ye shall be holy; for I [am] holy: neither shall ye defile yourselves with any manner of creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth.
Lev 11:45 For I [am] the LORD that bringeth you up out of the land of Egypt, to be your God: ye shall therefore be holy, for I [am] holy.
Lev 11:46 This [is] the law of the beasts, and of the fowl, and of every living creature that moveth in the waters, and of every creature that creepeth upon the earth:
Lev 11:47 To make a difference between the unclean and the clean, and between the beast that may be eaten and the beast that may not be eaten.
Blue Letter Bible. "Leviticus 11 - King James Version." Blue Letter Bible. 1996-2009. 25 Mar 2009.